We have the opportunity to develop many kinds of relationships with Family, Friends, Extended Family, Children, Spouse, Companion and Colleagues. Enjoy the opportunities to express true kindness to all that you meet or currently have relationships with. Developing strong and genuine relationships provide companionship or a shoulder to cry on, or a partner to laugh with, or people to collaborate with.
The need and desire for relationships are universal, we were all meant to cultivate and enjoy many relationships and as we create synergy within the human race, abundant joy, purpose, and serenity will resonate.
The organic desire to nourish a relationship with another is an intrinsic reminder that we are all here to help, love, and serve each other…to be a constant support and a gentle haven of kindness to one and all on our journey and path. When we recognize the divine and simple understanding that we are all more alike than we are different, it is then that we have truly understood the reason for our existence.
There are several types of relationships that can be included in the Relationship section of your LifeVision. These will vary according to your specific situation. Here are some thoughts and examples of relationships you may want to include in you Relationships LifeVision.
Spouse: We search the world over to find a perfect mate…one with whom we can share mutual love, acceptance, success, failure, solace, and satisfaction. One with whom we intend to share the rest of our life. Sometimes, not long after marriage before we find ourselves caught up in the busyness of life. We begin concentrating on what we want to accomplish individually instead of focusing on the most important part of our marriage…our spouse.
Tending to this relationship through communication, appreciation, and sharing feelings is vital. Include in your Relationships LifeVision how you see the perfect relationship with your spouse. This is the section where you can be incredibly outward focused. Because this LifeVision is about you, it will include all the things that you can BE and DO to be the perfect mate.
What if you’re not married? Well….do you want to be? If so, consider this sample that incorporates attracting the perfect companion into your life.
“I have the perfect companion who I love unconditionally. She is so beautiful. We share the same love for health, outdoor activities, personal development and spirituality. We have a deep connection physically, emotionally and spiritually. We share the same financial philosophies and abundant paradigm. She is kind and generous. She is so supportive of my sobriety, which makes it easy for me to focus my energy on love and happiness in our relationship. We are supportive of each other’s businesses and the principles that we teach our clients. We push each other to excel and grow in life and business. We compliment each other and make each other better. We have the perfect combination of independence, freedom, respect and reliance in our relationship. She loves me for who I am. We have engaging conversations where we teach each other exciting things that we are learning in our lives. Each week we have a scheduled “date night” where we go out to a nice dinner, movie or enjoy a fun activity together. This allows us to spend quality time together, focusing on us as a couple. She is my best friend. I attract this person by exemplifying all of these qualities in my own life.”
Children: Spending quality time with their children is a goal of many parents. We must create…not find….time for our children. As part of the Relationship section of your LifeVision, if you have children, powerfully suggest to your mind through your writing all the ways you can be a better parent; spending more time together, showing love and affection, training and teaching, and supporting.
This section regarding children may start with a general section. This may include the kind of a parent you want to be for your child. Next, write a small paragraph for your child or each child, mention them by name. In this paragraph, state a few qualities about this child that you particularly admire. This helps your mind focus on the positive aspects of the child. Then, write several sentences about what you can do to be a good parent along with anything specific you would like to work on in the relationship. Be careful not to write statements that describe the kind of child you want them to be, but rather the kind of parent you want to be that will inspire them to be productive and happy individuals.
Extended Family: Include aspects of relationships with siblings; parents, grandparents and aunts/uncles/cousins that you feel would be appropriate. This is especially fitting if the relationship is strained and needs a new perspective to create the ideal bond.
Social- Friends, Colleagues and Peers: The social relationships we enjoy with our peers, friends or colleagues are essential. The benefits and value of these relationships bring are reciprocity and commitment between individuals who see themselves more or less as equals. These relationships can provide an emotional resource both for having fun and support in times of worry or sadness. Invite these relationships into your life.
When writing this section, describe yourself as a warm, loving, vulnerable, approachable, open and authentic person and watch the miracles happen in your life. You can write this section with a broad stroke of what you would like these relationships to look like or specifically name someone you would like to build or strengthen a friendship with. Include the ways you would like to be with these social relationships. You can also include here any social skills you would like to develop. For example: If you are shy or introverted, visualize yourself as being confident in social situations. Maybe you’d like to be a better conversationalist or be great at remembering names. You can become anything you visualize clearly and in detail.
Download and listen to Relationship Audio
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A mindful practice that would create close bonds and do wonders for improving your marriage or relationship with your companion would be making time for each other. This sends the clear and loving message of “You are important to me.” “I want to be with you.” I love sharing time with you.” “ I am interested in what you have to say.” The importance of creating this time together is monumental in creating a successful, loving, and fulfilling relationship with your spouse or companion. Schedule an evening, an afternoon, or weekend away, just the two of you. Enjoy each other’s company. Focus on the positive things about your relationship, remind yourself of all the reasons you fell in love. Laugh, hold hands, and talk to each other. Ask about their day, what things they dream of. Express gratitude for them. Thank them for the things they do for you big and small.
Ask each other for ideas they might have improve your relationship. Ask each for ideas of how to improve communication or support for each other. Listen in a non-defensive way. The goal is to understand what each other is thinking, meaning, feeling and wanting. You want to achieve information to understand what your spouse or companion is thinking or feeling. If you become defensive it will only shut your companion down. Then you are limited in your understanding and unable to solve a problem or resolve any conflict. Write down the suggestions made. Don’t defend yourself, but rather take the position that maybe you need to reconsider your behavior in these areas to improve your relationship.
Get on the same page with your spouse or companion. Talk about goals that you want to achieve together as a couple. What things can you do together that will strengthen your bond? Write all of these things you discover in your journal. This time together is also a great time to discuss family goals, write the ways you would like to strengthen your family together. Perhaps take a yearly weekend away and discuss upcoming goals for the year or what you can do together to strengthen your marriage and your family. When both partners are on the same page and in alignment with each other and the things they want to create together, bonds are formed that significantly strengthen the relationship and allow for your relationship to grow in love, commitment and trust.
What would your relationship with your children be like if you spent consistent quality time with them? Consider planning some alone time with each of your children. If they are young, this can be planned to spend at home or a special outing. Older children might enjoy going to a movie or take a bike ride, hike or walk together. It can be anything you choose, keeping in mind that it is a time you are focused on spending time with them with no interruptions or other responsibilities.
Plan these times together as regularly as possible. Make it standing appointment if possible. Standing weekly or monthly appointment spending time with those you love is time well spent. Find out what is going on in their world. The most important thing a children needs to know is that they are OK in your eyes. Tell them how proud you are of them. Express you love and appreciation for them. Enjoy, embrace and honor their own unique gifts and talents. Laugh and play and just have fun!
Let the people in your life know you are thinking of them. It takes little time to send messages of love or gratitude for the people that mean the most to you. Tuck a thoughtful note somewhere they will find it, send a Birthday card or a Just Thinking About You card. (Check out Send Out Cards for an easy way to show appreciation )Text them a message telling them how wonderful you think they are. Call them on the phone and visit with them. These small tokens of love and appreciation are a way to reach out to those we hold dear. Make these mindful practices and habits an important part of developing the relationships your desire in your life.
Take the opportunity to express true kindness to everyone with whom you come in contact. Give a simple smile to someone you pass, or extend a helping hand to a stranger crossing the street or with arms full is an opportunity to practice kindness. We all need each other. The ripple effect of random and simple acts of kindness is far reaching.
In his bestselling book, The Power of Intention, Wayne Dyer writes about the effect of kindness on the human body. Scientists studied brain activity of individuals as they performed an act of kindness for another. They found increased levels of serotonin; the chemical the brain produces to make you feel good, and the common ingredient in antidepressant medication. That wasn’t all they found. In those receiving the acts of kindness researchers recorded the same amount of serotonin as in those giving the service. It was further determined that even those observing the acts of kindness produced the same amount of serotonin.
Download Relationship Packet[/tab] [tab title=”Questions to Ponder”]
What can I do to be a better spouse? How would this improve my marriage?
I can show my spouse I want to improve our marriage by…
What positive qualities in my spouse do I want to reinforce?
I express approval to my spouse by…
What things about my family am I proud of? Why do these things make me proud?
What in my family life would I like to change? If this were changed, how would my family life be different?
How can I be a better parent and what specifically can I do?
How can I encourage more love in my family?
Does my child know that I love them and that I am proud of them? Does my child know that they are “OK” in my eyes?
I show affection and attention to each family member by…
How much quality time do I spend with my family? How much time, quality and quantity, would I like to spend? What would I do with this time?
What kind of companion would I like to attract? What qualities or characteristics do they have?
What can I do to be more open and free with others?
What can I do to be a better listener? How would this improve my social and family life?
What can I do to be a better friend?
What kinds of people do I want to surround myself with?
How do I spend my weekends, with whom and how do we socialize?
How do I treat people that I come in contact with? Someone I pass on the street? A waiter? A customer service representative? An elderly person? A person with a disability?
[/tab] [tab title=”Resources”]
Send Out Cards
Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
The Business of Marriage
[/tab] [tab title=”Examples”]
Being a wife and mother are my most important roles. My family is the center of my life and Dave is the center of my heart. I love Dave so much. He is perfect in every way. He is kind, thoughtful, fun, interesting, and beautiful, inside and out. He is my best friend. I adore him unconditionally, and supports him in his every desire and wish. He is the soul mate of my dreams. I look into his face and see his depth, his character, and his life full of so much learning and experience and wisdom. The passionate quality and spontaneity of our lovemaking is intensely satisfying to both of us, and it is an integral part of our deep bonds of closeness, which lifts us to a higher plane.
We love being together sharing our daily activities. We share the love of good music, books, concerts, and the outdoors, as well as traveling together as often as possible discovering the beauties of the world. I am creative in planning dates, such as dancing, outdoor adventures, and other ways of filling our souls. I bring satisfying comfort and quality experiences that add a multitude of dimensions to make our lives very rich in every possible way. With him by my side, I feel secure and satisfied financially, emotionally, spiritually, physically, and sexually.
I can talk easily to my husband about anything, anytime, always being honest and clear. We respect each other’s wisdom, spirituality, time and personal space. I give him verbal and physical approval in public and privately. My communication skills are in tune with universal light, all truth and knowing. I listen with love and a deep sense of connection. I always pick up on others needs. I am developing the gift for being intuitive. We focus on making our marriage a top priority by encouraging and being available for weekly date nights, quarterly weekends away, as well as at least one longer trip away annually.
We have monthly meetings together discussing finances, goals, and plans. We are always open and honest, sharing our desires, hopes, and concerns. Dave & I discuss each of our children each week and set goals and tasks for things we can do to assist them.
I love to serve my children by helping them with homework, making them breakfast and dinner and assisting them in music lessons, sports and scouts. I am home in the afternoons so I can be there for my children. I know my children are unique and have incredible talents and abilities. I do whatever I can to nurture them to realize their full measure. I look for many opportunities for one-on-one time with my children. This is a time when we really bond and connect and the effort pays off tremendously. We enjoy being together and I always ask them how things are going in their lives. We have our married children over twice a month for dinner.
I am sensitive to each of my children’s particular personalities and needs. I recognize each one for who they are. I know their individual worth. I remember and honor their likes and dislikes. I pray for them individually every day.
I enjoy my relationship with my daughter Carolee. We spend time together each week talking about our future plans, opportunities & mothering. Carolee has much ambition and talents that amaze me. I am continually impressed with her maturity, her relationship that she is building with Jordan & her little Sammy and her dedication to improve her surroundings.
Sophia is a sweetheart and we are lucky to have her in our family. Her gifts include offering the gift of friendship to many. She is a great friend and goes out of her way to be a great friend. She is conscientious about her education and has a desire to grow spiritually and to develop her talents.
My son Ryan is one of my best friends. He and I enjoy spending time together as our “boys night out” every week. I am committed to my relationship as his father. I teach him principles that I think are important for him to learn when we are one on one and allow him to internalize them for himself. I am a great teacher and father to him. He is a great teacher and son to me. I golf with him on a bi-weekly basis. I take him swimming and shooting as much as he wants. I support him in his decisions and allow him to fail forward with all trials. All my children and grandchildren know they get enormous buckets of love, affection and approval from me, which is returned to me in abundance. I have been blessed with the greatest family in the world.
Socially, I am very active. I have a tremendous number of inspiring, fun and enjoyable friends. My friends come from all walks of life. I have a group of neighborhood friends that I am very involved with. I feel a part because I make the effort to get to know the women in my neighborhood.
I take part in a monthly book club. I am also a part of a luncheon group that meets monthly. I have healthy friendships and attract the people who are intended to be a part of my life. I have a picture in my mind of meeting the people who I’d like to have a soul friendship with. I act upon this inner picture of attracting ideal people into my life by practicing being the kind of person I wish to attract. I have an abundance of friends. Weekly, Dave and I go out with friends. Daily, I call one friend just to catch up and keep in touch.
I love my family more than anything in this world. I am blessed to have such heavenly spirits as my children. I express unconditional love to each one individually and collectively. Through my words and actions, my children know of their worth and importance to their family and friends. My attention is focused first on them and their needs and how I can make life more rewarding and fun for them. I always greet them with a smile in my eyes to show how excited I am to see them. My extended family and friends and my own family are in awe of the consideration and Christ like kindness I show my immediate family. I have a fantastic relationship and communication with each member of my family.
Because I love and respect each member of my family, I want them to grow emotionally, intellectually, spiritually, and physically. I love and respect them enough to allow them to take care of their own happiness. I always look for the positive aspects o their lives and compliment them.
Jared is very forgiving and tolerant towards his sister and brothers. They look up to him and share mutual respect for each other. There is an unspoken and deep connection that he and I share when we are together.
Jason is fun-loving and makes us all laugh with his sense of humor when we are together. He has good common sense and problem-solving ability. He has been blessed with an abundant life. He is very generous with everyone and is sensitive towards others’ feelings.
Rachel is very creative and artistic. She uses this talent to be independent and provide for herself. She is very supportive of her brothers and they in turn love her very much. She values and cares for her health every day.
Because I am so happy with myself, I’m happy with those around me, especially my family. My positive example and loving manner with my family creates an atmosphere of love and harmony in our home. I realize the predominant spirit in the home is a reflection of my spirit. For this reason I am always patient with my children. My children know that they can come to me no matter how they feel and can count on me being a good listener and having lots of understanding. I seek for their counsel and advice where appropriate. I know that asking my children for input adds a very special dimension to our relationship and helps us to be much closer, sharing concern for each other and being more aware of each other’s needs and feelings. They are also much more receptive to advice when I do this. I am always easy to along with-tolerant and pleasant.
My perfect companion is a very successful professional who has a good humor and is a fun loving person. He is an outdoorsman and plans camping trips and hikes for the family. He makes me laugh and brings great joy to others. He is extremely sensitive to my needs and is very helpful. He is in good shape and inspires me to stay in great shape. He is my best friend and confidant. We enjoy spending time together. He senses when I am discouraged or frustrated, and demonstrates his endless love by dropping whatever is on his agenda to spend some time with me. He gives me little gifts to show me that he is thinking of me and likes to hold hands. He gives me a big hug and kiss every time he departs or when we meet again. All my children know how much we love each other and of our special relationship. We are an excellent example to them.
I love people and I am thankful for my opportunities to interact with those around me. I look for the good qualities in others and make a special point of giving honest compliments and praise. I am tolerant of values and backgrounds that are different from my own. I see each person as a son or daughter of God and allow that person his or her weaknesses.
I am a fantastic conversationalist. I keep myself well informed and am able to discuss current events and issues intelligently. I do this by listening to radio programs and reading the newspaper and fine books. I am a warm and loving person. I create an atmosphere of comfort and safety when others are confiding in me. I have a great sense of humor and am able to use that talent to put others at ease and relieve tension when appropriate.
I have a talent for putting my thoughts into words. When I am having a conversation with someone, I am assertive and able to say what I am thinking and feeling in a concise and interesting way, being tactful and diplomatic. I am honest and real. I listen empathetically and actively while the other person is talking, concentrating on what he or she is saying and the feelings behind the words.
I feel comfortable entertaining friends and colleagues in my home or attending social functions. I attract friends that share the same goals in life. I choose to be with people who uplift and enlighten, and learn from everyone I am around. I am fun to be around…spontaneous, creative, and exciting. I am positive and happy and have an uncanny ability to attract quality people. I enjoy life. That joy is contagious to those around me.
At work I give others space to make their own decisions, control their own lives, and encourage them to reach their potential. I give others the benefit of the doubt and realize they may have other perspectives. I allow others their weaknesses, focusing instead on their strengths. I expect the best of others but accept what they give. If I feel tension in a relationship, I work for resolution so the lines of affection are kept open.
I am gracious and appreciative. When others are giving or kind, I am responsive and grateful. I am generous and give of my time to help others. I am the first to laugh at my own mistakes, trying to help others feel comfortable or at ease when they make mistakes.
I feel each day that I am better than the day before, and I am excited at my progress. I love to feel the joy that comes in living in total harmony with my beliefs.